I’ve always been a laid back person, sometimes to a fault. However, since our daughter was born in 2012, I have suffered with anxiety. I mean, certain I’m about to die, panic attacks that wake me up in the middle of the night with a lightning bolt of adrenaline and fear of the unknown anxiety. There have been countless times during the day where I will feel a little twinge in my chest or arm and think to myself, “Well, this is it. I’m about to die.” It is not fun.
I worry about not being a good father or husband. I worry about the day that I will no longer be here for my children and my beautiful wife. I worry about our futures. I can take the most innocent of thoughts and turn it into the sulfuric fires of Mordor in a millisecond. It has been extremely hard. I am dealing with it, and it is getting better by God’s grace.
The most helpful to me has been God’s word. In Isaiah 43:4, we are told that we are “precious and honored” in God’s sight, and that He loves us. Wow. Do we take time to truly consider those words? Do we let them guide our day? Our thoughts, or reactions to others?
Christ defeated death on the cross, once and for all. I hate anxiety, but it pushes me closer to the cross and for that, I am thankful. I am thankful for His faithfulness. I am thankful that I’m not going through this alone. I am thankful that, as David said, “This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it!”.
Depending on the translation, the words “Do not fear…” are in the Bible 365 times. Maybe it’s a coincidence, but it is interesting that there are the same number of days in a year. I think we all could use a daily reminder of what we have in our savior, Jesus Christ. We all too often forget. We need to not focus on what might happen, and rest in what has.